86. That'll keep you going through the show

86. "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd

The Wall. I should just put the whole album on the countdown in one giant entry. With the way the songs merge into each other (kind of like Monty Python skits),  I could almost get away with it. I probably heard it a hundred times when Randy lived with us. He'd play something from it at least every couple days, and I'd make the request to hear something from it just about as often. It had some good mellow stuff that we liked to play while we just lay in bed and listened. This song was the best of the mellow tunes.

Here's a video Randy would have appreciated. It's Dr. Strange singing the doctor's part on "Comfortably Numb."



The song has taken on new layers of meaning as I've gotten older. I was thinking just this morning about how different I am now from when I was kid listening to all this music from the 70s and 80s. I'm really not trying to relive my past, but it can be surreal at times when listening to these songs because every now and then I get a quick flash of memory that brings back the feelings I had back then. And for a moment, it's like I'm that kid again looking at my older self, and I think, "What the hell happened to you?! You aren't anything like the person I wanted to become!"

And sometimes when I think about it honestly, the answer always comes down to the simple fact that I have indeed become comfortably numb. That's when it feels like I'm just waiting for the worms to come.

When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown
The dream is gone
I have become comfortably numb

But other times when I think about it, the answer is that there's still that best part of my younger self that's just waiting for me to get over my old-man cynicism and start having fun again. And that young inner Daren got a big boost this last Monday evening when Julie gave me the go-ahead to buy a motorcycle. My brother and sister-in-law said that as soon as I got on the bike, they saw the teenager in me come right out. And I have to say that the smell of the gasoline, and the sound of the engine, and the feeling of freedom I get riding it has really given old-man Olson a real kick in the butt. So, say hello to my 1977 Honda CT 125. It's old and slow and dinged up and needs some parts fixed up--kind of like me. Hopefully, it will help me go from being comfortably numb to comfortably fun.