135. Crimes and Misdemeanors

135. "Hella Good" by No Doubt

Confession time. I have weakness for a certain type of female voice. It's the voice you hear on records by Pat Benatar, Kim Wilde, Missing Persons, and The Motels. It's one of my musical guilty pleasures. And when I say "guilty" I don't mean in the sense of "Oh no, I just ate a second donut, and now I feel so guilty." I mean it in the sense of "Dammit! I think I just committed manslaughter!"

I don't know why I like it. I just do.

That's why when I heard Gwen Stefani sing for the first time, I didn't really want to like her singing. I wanted to hate it. I wanted the group to fail miserably, break up, and go away forever. But No Doubt just kept turning out more and more songs that hit the charts. I tried to ignore them. I tried to hate them. I tried to mock them. I even made up lyrics to "Don't Speak" that turn it into a song about wet poopy farts called "Don't Squeak." But when I heard the opening bass lines to "Hella Good," I had to admit that I really liked the song, and I probably liked No Doubt, and I probably liked Gwen Stefani.

In my own defense, your honor, the song was based on funk sounds like "Brick House" and "Another One Bites the Dust." It says that on Wikipedia, so it has to be true. I'm a sucker for good bass sounds, and "Hella Good" triggers that reflex to crank up the radio to feel that deep rumble that shakes the rear view mirror. So, am I guilty. Yes. However, the real question is have I been convicted of a musical crime? And to that my answer is the same as what my nephew Ryan once said in a job interview when they asked him if he'd ever been convicted of a felony. He said, "Convicted?.... No."

This song also came out during my step-aerobic and running years in grad school when I got rid of so much weight. This was one of the songs I liked to work out to, so now it's got that whole good memory thing going for it. So even though I feel humiliated to admit it, I really like this song. However, I hate the music video, so I'm not going to subject you to that horror. Instead, I'll put down that boring YouTube version that just shows the album cover. But to make it interesting, I'll also include that green-screen zebra video below it so you can watch the zebra keep on dancing while you listen. Why? Because dancing zebras are hella good!